I stood in the white snow, peering down a forest trail that
was decorated with fairy lights and candles in mason jars. I had been brought
to this place, just off of Fox Drive, under the impression that I would be
looking at Christmas lights with my lovely girlfriends.
In the dim light, I made out the figures of two people
standing on the path ahead. As I walked closer I realized I knew them, my dear
friends Nova and Nathan. I walked closer to them and they began to single me
out, they had chosen the word “wild” to describe me and this word was cast in
shadows upon the tree behind them. They spoke to me of lovely things, about our
friendship and about things they saw God doing in me. They prayed for me and I
walked on, down the path, enchanted by the forest. At the next stop, Paige and
Christine spoke to me, the word “unique” cast upon the tree behind them. As I
traveled on down the path, they stayed behind. Next was Hannah with a note from
my lovely LeeAnna, the word “admirable” appeared on a tree there. And still, I
walked on. Just my Jacki, my lifetime best friend, and I left. As we followed
the candles, the sound of Old Pine danced upon our ears. Jacki stopped me
before we turned a corner. She read me notes from my loved ones which brought
me to tears: Jayme and my brother, James. This tree said “in my heart”, a quote
from my brother’s letter to me, which naturally brought me to tears. Last,
Jacki spoke to me softly about the lives we had shared together and about
Christ, He who we had found together and who had kept us walking together all
these years. We walked further, our feet crunching in the snow. There was
Andrew, underneath a tree that was lit up by fairy lights. Jacki hugged me, and
she let me go.
I walked to Andrew, alone now. We stood under the tree. He
began to speak to me about God and about our relationship. He spoke of our
future and of our mission to glorify God—and how he wanted to live his life
with me, doing radical things for the Kingdom of God.
He got down on one knee and opened a small box. Inside was a
small wooden fox that he had carved. On it, it said “marry me?” Foxes have
always been one of Andrew’s favorite animals. When he was a young boy, about
five, he had a dream that he still remembers vividly to this day. In the dream he
was following a fox through the forest with a girl, a girl that he always said
was the girl he was going to marry. He told me, “I want you to be the girl I was
following foxes with in my dreams. I want you to be the woman I follow God with
for the rest of my life. Will you marry me?”
I said yes. He took a ring out of his pocket and told me
that he had gotten a friend to gather twigs from my trees at home and he had
gotten his brother and sister-in-law to gather a few twigs from his farm. He
had them cast into gold, intertwined, with a diamond to make my ring. He
slipped it on my finger. He told me that he wanted to use twigs from our homes
because he knew our roots were important and no matter where we went, we would
always have our deep roots.
We walked out of the forest, through the snow. All our
friends were at the bottom of the bridge and began clapping as we came. I love
my friends dearly and am so thankful they were there to be a part of this night
and a part of the this new chapter of life that Andrew and I are walking into
together.
**********
The time had finally come. After days of preparation and
weeks of thought and 10 pocket checks during the Christmas banquet to make sure
the ring was still safely snugged deep in my inner coat, it was nearly time to
propose to my Abby.
She was being held up in Remedy with a few of her
girlfriends while myself and several other amazing people, Calvin, Matt, Chris,
Tori, Nathanial, Nova and Nathan, frantically hung lights down a forest trail,
cast words upon trees, packed down snow, prepared music, and powered fairy
lights around and in the tree that would stand over the place of proposal.
My hands were cold, but I hardly noticed this as I walked up
and down the forest trail to make sure things were ready. After about forty
minutes of setup I thought I heard the sound of other voices and my heart
jumped at what was confirmed by Nova to be the arrival of Abby and the other
girls. Matt hurried down the trail to alert the others that “the bird had
landed!” and I made my way the lit up tree. There I waited with Nathanial, who
was hiding amidst trees nearby ready to take photos. I stood thinking about
what was finally happening and how much it felt like a dream, the very best
kind of dream. And there I stood as I began to hear voices talking to Abby and
the beginning of guitar strings reverberating through the forest as Old Pine, a
song by Ben Howard that Abby and I had chosen as our own, starting playing. Then,
with a sudden realization there was a moment of panic as I realized that the
song would end before Abby would reach me, and I did not know whether it was on
repeat or if the sound of Katie Perry’s Hear
me Roar, or some other artist would soon interrupt and break the serene
moment. I quietly voiced my concerns to Nathaniel nearby by and he carefully
slipped over to the player and confirmed that it was on repeat. Thank you
Calvin for thinking to do that.
Calm again, I listened to the sounds of friends sharing
their love for Abby and of how incredible she is. Now and again there was a
faint sob amidst the words. Then before too long there were two girls, Jacki
and Abby, walking up the trail to place I stood. They hugged and then Jacki turned around and walked away.
Then, the most beautiful girl I know stepped towards me and
we just hugged for about as long as moment like this would require of an
embrace. By then, every word I had thought of had all but completely faded
away. I was left looking at this woman, smiling in my heart but probably having
the most idiotic expression on my face, holding her hands. I could not think of
anything to say that would do any justice to this moment. However, there were
things that had to be said, and there was a question I had to ask. I told her
how I could not describe how much worth she has to me and to our friends, not
with a thousand words on a thousand trees. I told her how much I loved how she
values her friendships and that I knew that they had to be a part of this
event. I told her how she reminds me to be a writer, a poet, and an artist and
that she makes me want to make this life a story worth telling. I reminded her
of the dream I had when I was five years old where I chased a fox through the
woods with a girl I did not know at the time, and how I always thought to myself that that girl must be the one I was
going to marry, and that I wanted her, Abby, to be the girl I followed the fox
with in my dreams, and to be the woman I followed God with for the rest of my
life. I asked her if she would marry me, and she said yes.